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What Its Like to Have a Colourful Personality

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I think everyone feels out of place. Weird. Odd. Different. Those feelings resonated with me growing up because I have an extremely colourful personality.

Pictures by my girl Raya at Style Controversy

Almost in my mid-twenties, I realized that I allowed the world around me to soften my edges. And dull some of my bright sides. I was super bubbly and chatty as a kid, and while I retained some of that lustre, it just wasn't the same.

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Shirt: Gap, Pants, Gap, Shoes: Urban Outfitters, Purse: Zara Vest: Similar

Passive aggressive comments and jealous remarks from people I considered to be friends weighed heavy on me. 'What's wrong with me?' I used to think. 'Why can't I just be normal?' I used to ask myself. Even before I was homeschooled for most of high school, I would ponder on my inability to be able to fit in and the anxiety I had surrounding it. I often spent lunch breaks alone and explored the historical neighbourhood I grew up in by myself. Or I volunteered at my school library and buried myself in the plots of my heroes, getting lost in their fictional lives that seemed as tragic as my own.

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I also grew up in a pretty strict and religious household. So I couldn't go out to parties or dress like everyone else. Being pulled out of school seemed to be the final nail in the coffin that was my blah social life.

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But all of these things made me, me. I wouldn't change any of it. Instead, I've tried to embrace what I can't change and just roll with the punches. I won't allow criticism to shape me unless it's constructive and from the heart.

Do you have a colourful personality, too? Let me know in the comments!